Guest Blog Post - Dan Ziv, CEO, TouchNote
/The Art of Kindness: Helping Under-Pressure Mums During Covid-19
The pressures of being a mum are exhausting and demanding at the best of times and for some can lead to loneliness, depression, anxiety and isolation. In the age of COVID-19, the pressures are even greater and evolving at a speed capable of striking fear and anxiety into even the most ‘seasoned’ of jugglers.
Juggling work, home-schooling, job uncertainties, the daily pressures of family life in lockdown and (for some) the emotionally-charged decision on whether to send children back to nursery or school is undoubtably taking its toll.
To recognise the pressure on stressed-out mums and do something to help ease it, we enlisted the help of some of our very own TouchNote customers, alongside experienced female graphic designers and artists. The women, many of whom have experienced anxiety & depression first hand and all of whom are busily managing family life, submitted uplifting greeting card designs to help support other struggling parents.
The result is ‘The Art of Kindness’, a beautiful, touching and uplifting collection of greeting cards that tap into a range of mental health issues; everything from the pressure to stay ‘on trend’ through to accepting imperfections and managing feelings of overwhelm.
The collection is available until the end of July and all of the proceeds are going to the Mental Health Foundation, which has been working to support young mums and new parents for a number of years.
Recent research shows that one-to-one communication, such as sending cards and letters, has a positive impact on mood and mental health releasing positive neurochemicals in the brain. We therefore hope these heartfelt cards go some way towards encouraging and helping mums to reconnect with each other during these troubling times, by sending notes of kindness to let their friends know they ‘get it’ and they’re not alone.
The cards contain hope-filled messages and can be personalised, printed and posted straight through the TouchNote app on a phone - without the need for stamps or leaving the house to visit the post office.
The group of women have wide-ranging backgrounds and include a qualified counsellor, headteacher, mental health nurse and a breastfeeding coordinator. Each of the women have their own unique stories, experience and advice that helped to shape the theme of their designs:
I’m Here For You… Always by TouchNote user Sarah who always coped and portrayed a façade that everything was fine, until the birth of her child. She said: “I often found myself crying inconsolably over the slightest thing and getting angry over petty stuff. I kept going, but the world around me was closing in. I had no idea at the time, but I was slowly hitting a real deep depression. It was at some point during this time that I turned to my love of art. I used it to diarise my day-to-day life by using colour to represent my mood changes throughout a given day. It became an outlet to just be still and it allowed me to remove myself from everything else going on. It was like a form of mindfulness, it gave me some sort of release. My message to anyone who is struggling is simply don’t be embarrassed to seek help, don’t give up trying to get help if it is not offered, do make sure you find people who will listen. Just knowing someone's got your back or is thinking of you is hugely comforting”.
No Such Thing as Perfect by artist Lucy Parsons, a mum of two who has a degree in mental health nursing, shows how everyone is different and beautiful in their own right. She says: “Sometimes it seems like the rest of the world is striving forward and you feel the only one who is ten steps behind. I remember standing at the playground gates, feeling awful but trying to appear ok. Another Mum asked, ‘Are you ok?’. Just a simple question, but it can mean so much to someone who is struggling. I answered, ‘I just feel I should be coping’. I was near to tears. Another Mum, sitting nearby said, ‘None of us are coping!’. It made me feel a connection to so many people who struggle every day with feelings of inadequacy, fear and anxiety and who feel alone”.
On Trend by Helene, a professional illustrator and ‘knackered mum’ from Cornwall, says: “I just hope my illustrations make other mums and dads realise that they’re not alone on this crazy parenting rollercoaster. Having Multiple Sclerosis (MS) has in some way prepared me to cope with isolation better than I would have. I’ve already experienced weeks, sometimes months, where my life is effectively put on hold. The advice I’m currently giving to myself is: Try not to battle against things that you have no control over. Try not to put so much pressure on yourself, just focus on surviving one day at a time. Know that this WILL get better”.
Take What You Need by Rebekah McDougall, a qualified counsellor and the founder of Journey to Wellness, a platform for mental health advocacy. She says: “I’ve had my own anxiety challenges, and as a new mother, this surfaced again. I want people to know that they are not alone. That you can get through this. Be gentle and kind with yourself - self-compassion has been my biggest learning - everday I try to remind myself and others that we are worthy, exactly as we are”.
Three Mums by TouchNote user Eleanor King, a Breastfeeding Project Coordinator from Southend-on-Sea in Essex, showcases how communities can help rebuild trust. She says: “There are so many expectations from society on women, particularly on new mums. When people can connect together and share experiences honestly, kindly and with care, a lot of healing can take place.”
First My Mum, Forever My Friend by TouchNote user Dr Emily Haddock, Executive Headteacher. She says: “I know how hard it is for the families being away from their children, so I had this in mind when I was designing the card. Making the decision to put your child into care and accepting that someone else can more effectively provide the care that they need, is one of the hardest and bravest things a parent can do”.
Be Kind to Yourself by TouchNote user Lucy, who suffered post natal depression after the birth of her daughter 11 years ago and spent “a few blissful hours” designing these cards with her. A rainbow is a natural symbol of hope, which is what I needed to cling to in dark days. It is so hard when feeling depressed to lift yourself out of the feelings of utter despair, and equally hard for friends and family to know what to say to help....one day at a time is a good mantra”.
Take a Deep Breath by Poppy Chancellor, an inspiring cut-out artist. “'Take a deep breath' was made to inspire us to take a step back and simply breathe and relax. During Covid-19 our regular habits of happiness have been halted with a huge impact on our mental health. I have started a daily meditation practice to re-connect to the calmer parts of my thinking. Focusing on breathing really lets me connect with my body and slows my overthinking brain”.
Other designs include I Need Space by illustrator Paula Kuka and Heart Full, Hands Full by artist Catie Atkinson.
On Trend Design by Helene the Illustrator
Over the past few months we have all shared feelings of distress and yet seen utter kindness too. We couldn’t be more proud of this collection of beautiful cards and their inspiring messages to help support mums, and others, who find themselves under huge pressure. We hope that the Art of Kindness helps people to continue sharing love and hope during these difficult times.
Bio:
I'm CEO of personal communication platform TouchNote, having previously founded two businesses and a charity (Children Playing Chess, a volunteer chess club in schools). Prior to TouchNote, I was co-founder and Head of Product of Uncover, the award-winning premium restaurant reservation app and previously an M&A lawyer in the technology sector. I studied law and economics at Tel Aviv University and completed an MBA at London Business School. I'm also an advisor and board-member in several early and later stage startups, mentors at Techstars London and Entrepreneur in Residence at the London Business School.
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